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A few days ago, I did not feel well. She told me she met someone a day before and she apologized (as we created a feeling between us) and she was being honest with me. She told me she was not sure about it since they two just met, but she would like to meet him again and know him well. I saw her messages while I was having a call with my family. I was not sure how I should take care of the situation, so I hung up the call and took a deep breath. That hurts. That really hurts. The moment I saw her apology, I felt part of myself was falling apart. The only thing I did was to tell her something like, ‘We are friends and we have not met in person. If that happens, that happens. If he was the guy for you, then I am happy for you. I guess it’s just that it was not the right time between us since we have not met. We can still chat if you want.’ Part of me believed that that’s really it, while part of me still believed that I still have a chance. I do not know. I really don’t. I don’t know if she still has feelings for me, and when we met in person, we would then fall in love with each other. I don’t know what she thinks about me, a friend or a potential long-term partner.
https://kilriosity.wordpress.com/2021/06/02/riding-a-roller-coaster
Learning the Game 